Do you realize just how much crap you have stored away that you have no use for, yet can't seem to part company with?
When I was growing up, we used to laugh at how my dad's mother couldn't throw ANYTHING away. Soup labels, coffee cans, ice cream pails, the plastic Easter eggs we used to hunt every spring on the family farm -- if she determined it had some kind of value, she was hanging on to it and was not about to throw it away.
The stairway to the second floor of their house had always been the place where these things were stored. For as long as I could remember, we'd always have to maneuver around piles of newspaper clippings, plastic buckets and about anything else you could think of, all in an effort to get to the upstairs bedroom.
It seems we are a nation of packrats. I'm sure that you could walk in anybody's house and find a room where there is nothing but unopened boxes full of stuff that had been packed away with the idea that the individuals involved would get around to sorting out, but have long since forgotten.
As it turns out, this annoying trait is one that is passed down through the generations. My dad's house and shop and my mom's house are fast becoming glorified storage units for anything and everything you can possibly think of. Old kids clothes, stereo equipment, rarely-used exercise equipment, knick-knacks of all shapes and sizes . . . if a fire started in either of their houses, it would burn for a solid week.
My sister has a room just like this in the basement of her house. She and her husband have more boxes of stuff in there than you can count, and I'm sure if they spent a weekend going through those boxes they would discover a bunch of stuff that they have no use for, but can't seem to find it in their hearts to part company with.
And now that trait has been passed on to me, as I've found during the last few weeks that I'm in possession of a lot of stuff that I had completely forgotten about.
I made this discovery in beginning the efforts to move to another city. I was looking for some old computer discs to transfer files to my computer when I happened upon a big box full of old bank statements, paid bills and other paperwork.
We're not talking a file folder full of paper here, folks -- When piled on the floor, the pile reached up well past my lower desk drawer. The paper shredder I recently bought to take care of a box of paperwork I had discovered earlier is getting one whale of a workout these last few days. I've filled at least three garbage bags full of shredded paper in the last month, and the pile of paper remaining is going to be good for at least that many more.
I feed it in between hands while playing poker online, feed it some more while I'm eating dinner and give it another good feeding before I go to bed at night. If paper was high in cholesterol, this shredder would have had a massive heart attack several times over by now. With over 20 years worth of paperwork to chew up, it wouldn't surprise me if this shredder keels over from exhaustion -- it's already overheated more times than I care to count.
The good thing in all of this is that it has inspired me to dig deep into my closets and into the boxes of stuff I have stored at my dad's shop. With a move coming in the next few weeks, I have enough time to go through all of this stuff, determine what is of REAL personal or financial value to me and either repackage it for the move, send it to the trash or sell it on Ebay.
My goal is to actually have fewer boxes to load for this move than I did for the last one. If I can get that accomplished, I'm sure there will be more room left in the U-Haul for the REALLY important stuff.
Now what box did I put the remote control to the TV in? I know it's here somwhere . . .
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Will the younger generation get it now? Or when it's too late?
It's often been said that life is lived forward and understood backward -- we move through our daily lives doing certain things, but we don't understand the impact on the decisions we have made until after the fact.
It's something that is really beginning to bother me as I continue on into my fifth decade of life. I've spent some time over the past few years looking back on some of the decisions I have made in my life, wondering where my life would be if I had made them differently.
I've also tried to utilize these experiences in an effort to communicate with the generations behind me in an effort to steer them away from some of the dumber moves I've made in my life (and, yes, there have been a few -- more than I care to mention in specific detail here). And the question I'm always left with is -- do the younger generations even get it? And by the time they do, will it be too late?
I'm sure this is something that was, and still is, of concern to those who are older than I am. Between my parents and some of the wonderful personal and professional mentors I have who are getting up there in years, there is a TON of experience there that not only is being lost on the younger generations, but will soon be gone forever.
You never think about your own mortality when you're younger. Mom and Dad are taking care of the roof over your head, the clothes on your back and the food in your belly. More often than not, they even succumb to your unceasing desire to have the best toys, the trendiest clothes and whatever bell or whistle is required for you to be a part of the "it" group.
It is during those years when you can most benefit from the experience of those who have come before you. In the vast majority of cases, whatever challenge the younger generation faces has been experienced by those who have come before them. And yet, it seems that the younger generation is missing out on a golden opportunity to learn from those who have paved the road they now travel on.
My parents never did drugs when they were in college, and while I heard stories about some of my dad's exploits in college, I never really got much information on how to "live the college life." I learned it all on my own and made some mistakes that, looking back, were really stupid. I first smoked pot and experimented with other drugs in college. I drank a TON of alcohol in college. On occasion, I actually studied in college (which, supposedly, is what you are SUPPOSED to do -- but nobody mentioned anything about that to me).
Now, 20 years later, my daughter is in college and is making a move from a private, specialized school to a public university. The reason -- to "live the college life."
Her mother never really got to experience living on campus and doing all the crazy things college kids do, so she really doesn't have much of a personal reference to draw on when talking to my daughter about what she's about to encounter. Therefore, it's up to me to relay this information -- some of which is the kind of stuff no parent wants to see their kid involved in.
I'm very concerned about what "the college life" is all about in this day and age. When my parents were in their college-age years, about the only thing their parents had to worry about was excessive alcohol consumption. Drugs like LSD were just starting to find their way on college campuses during that time, and I'm sure there was a lot of concern about the effects those drugs would have on kids during that time.
Nowadays, it's a bigger, badder and scarier world. Alcohol and LSD are kids' stuff now. There are all kinds of drugs -- including methamphetamine -- that are out there now. Additionally, there are untold numbers of losers out there who seem to take a perverse pleasure in slipping something in the drink of an unsuspecting college girl, with the ultimate goal being to take her somewhere and rape her in her drugged-out state.
We never had these drugs around when we were in college, but having read and written enough about the topics over the years, I know what's out there and I know what kind of damage one of these scumbags can do on another human being -- like my own child.
As I said, life is lived forward and understood backward. The mistakes I've made in living my life are ones that I am able to understand years later, and I hope that somehow I can share those experiences -- much the same way as those older than me have done in sharing theirs -- and help today's younger generation avoid falling into the same traps I did when I was their age.
But will they get it now? Or will they wish they had later?
It's something that is really beginning to bother me as I continue on into my fifth decade of life. I've spent some time over the past few years looking back on some of the decisions I have made in my life, wondering where my life would be if I had made them differently.
I've also tried to utilize these experiences in an effort to communicate with the generations behind me in an effort to steer them away from some of the dumber moves I've made in my life (and, yes, there have been a few -- more than I care to mention in specific detail here). And the question I'm always left with is -- do the younger generations even get it? And by the time they do, will it be too late?
I'm sure this is something that was, and still is, of concern to those who are older than I am. Between my parents and some of the wonderful personal and professional mentors I have who are getting up there in years, there is a TON of experience there that not only is being lost on the younger generations, but will soon be gone forever.
You never think about your own mortality when you're younger. Mom and Dad are taking care of the roof over your head, the clothes on your back and the food in your belly. More often than not, they even succumb to your unceasing desire to have the best toys, the trendiest clothes and whatever bell or whistle is required for you to be a part of the "it" group.
It is during those years when you can most benefit from the experience of those who have come before you. In the vast majority of cases, whatever challenge the younger generation faces has been experienced by those who have come before them. And yet, it seems that the younger generation is missing out on a golden opportunity to learn from those who have paved the road they now travel on.
My parents never did drugs when they were in college, and while I heard stories about some of my dad's exploits in college, I never really got much information on how to "live the college life." I learned it all on my own and made some mistakes that, looking back, were really stupid. I first smoked pot and experimented with other drugs in college. I drank a TON of alcohol in college. On occasion, I actually studied in college (which, supposedly, is what you are SUPPOSED to do -- but nobody mentioned anything about that to me).
Now, 20 years later, my daughter is in college and is making a move from a private, specialized school to a public university. The reason -- to "live the college life."
Her mother never really got to experience living on campus and doing all the crazy things college kids do, so she really doesn't have much of a personal reference to draw on when talking to my daughter about what she's about to encounter. Therefore, it's up to me to relay this information -- some of which is the kind of stuff no parent wants to see their kid involved in.
I'm very concerned about what "the college life" is all about in this day and age. When my parents were in their college-age years, about the only thing their parents had to worry about was excessive alcohol consumption. Drugs like LSD were just starting to find their way on college campuses during that time, and I'm sure there was a lot of concern about the effects those drugs would have on kids during that time.
Nowadays, it's a bigger, badder and scarier world. Alcohol and LSD are kids' stuff now. There are all kinds of drugs -- including methamphetamine -- that are out there now. Additionally, there are untold numbers of losers out there who seem to take a perverse pleasure in slipping something in the drink of an unsuspecting college girl, with the ultimate goal being to take her somewhere and rape her in her drugged-out state.
We never had these drugs around when we were in college, but having read and written enough about the topics over the years, I know what's out there and I know what kind of damage one of these scumbags can do on another human being -- like my own child.
As I said, life is lived forward and understood backward. The mistakes I've made in living my life are ones that I am able to understand years later, and I hope that somehow I can share those experiences -- much the same way as those older than me have done in sharing theirs -- and help today's younger generation avoid falling into the same traps I did when I was their age.
But will they get it now? Or will they wish they had later?
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Failure can't define us -- but it can help us succeed
Nobody likes a loser.
Have you ever noticed how we, as a society, make so much out of the winners in life, while at the same time trip over ourselves to avoid the losers?
Everybody loves a winner, the old saying goes. If you are a winner at whatever you do, people love you. They want to be like you. They want to know what it takes for you to be the winner that you are.
But if you're a loser -- you might as well be dead in the eyes of some. Nobody wants to know what you're doing right, because they just assume everything you do is wrong. You can't get a phone call returned if you're a loser -- nobody wants to talk to you, maybe out of fear that your lack of success is somehow going to rub off on them.
The media, especially, loves a winner. How many times, during this past summer's Olympic Games, did we read, hear and watch stories about swimmer Michael Phelps, who set seven world records and won an Olympic-record eight gold medals in the pool? We heard about everything you could possibly want to know about Phelps, from his upbringing (he has attention-deficit disorder and was told by his school counselors that he wouldn't amount to much of anything), his family and even his amazing diet (which consists of so many calories that it would send most of us mere mortals into obesity faster than you can say "hardening of the arteries.").
Then there was the U.S. Olympic basketball team, a team of NBA athletes we already knew quite a lot about (if we actually pay attention to the NBA during the regular season). Players like Kobe Bryant, LeBron James, Dwight Howard and Jason Kidd have had their life stories told over and over again before the Olympics, and we heard even more in the days leading up to their gold-medal win over Spain in the finals.
There were many more stories of winners told throughout the games, but we didn't hear much about those who didn't win the gold, and even less about those who didn't perform well enough to earn even a bronze medal. Is that lazy journalism? Are we exerting so much energy covering the winners that the losers are cast aside and not worthy of our time?
Unfortunately, it comes down to a simple fact of life -- we love to know about the winners, and really aren't all that interested in the losers. But have you ever thought about those people who aren't successful on the world stage -- whether it's the Olympics or some other arena in life -- who are still winners in the game of life?
Many times, it's how an individual responds to defeat that ultimately defines whether or not that person is a winner in the ultimate game -- the game of life. It's how we bounce back from a losing effort that ultimately determines whether or not we are a success -- not in the eyes of the media, but in our own mind.
One Olympic athlete who I am quite sure fits this mold is a young man by the name of Brad Vering. Vering is a wrestler from the small town of Howells, Neb. He was a three-time state champion who went on to become a national champion in college while wrestling at the University of Nebraska in Lincoln and was a two-time member of the U.S. Olympic team in Greco-Roman wrestling.
I've had a number of opportunities over the years to meet and talk with Vering. When I was publishing an online wrestling website, I was able to feature Vering and had the chance to talk with him personally about his successes and failures in the sport.
Vering has worked incredibly hard to earn the chance to compete in two Olympics during his life. He has had a lot of success, but has also failed on numerous occasions. In fact, after his defeat in the 2004 Olympics, Vering struggled to keep his status as one of the best in his weight class. He tasted defeat on numerous occasions and almost didn't get a second chance at competing in the Olympics.
This summer, Vering was winning his first match when he was suddenly turned in the final 10 seconds. The two points he gave up was enough for his opponent to earn the victory and, in essence, kill Vering's hopes of winning a gold medal.
Does this make Vering a loser? Certainly not -- this young man has achieved more success than most of his critics could ever hope to achieve. I haven't had the chance to talk with Vering about his future plans, but I'm going to bet that whatever it is he decides to do with his life beyond wrestling is going to be a huge success. The lessons he has learned in victory -- and, more important, in defeat -- are lessons he will carry into whatever he does with his life from here on out. He may not have been a winner in his sport's ultimate arena -- but he is a winner in the ultimate game and will be throughout his life because of those lessons.
A number of years ago, the shoe company Nike created a commercial centering around basketball legend Michael Jordan. The commercial showed Jordan, in slow motion, getting off a bus and making his way through the bowels of an unknown arena.
As he walked, you could hear his voice talking about all the failures he has had as a basketball player. Many times he was part of a team that went down to defeat. He went many years without winning an NBA title. He was called upon to take the game winning shot and missed several times.
The commercial highlighted all the failures Jordan has experienced in his life as a professional basketball player. This man is arguably the greatest basketball player of all time, won six NBA titles and numerous Most Valuable Player awards, scoring titles and nominations to All-NBA teams, and yet all this commercial focused on was the failures he experienced. But it was how the commercial ended that brought home the importance of experiencing failure -- "I have failed numerous times in my life," Jordan says in the video. "And it is because I have failed, that I succeed."
Nobody likes losing, and nobody goes out and tries to lose in the game of life. And as much as we hope we can be successful in everything we do, failure (or the fear of it) should not define who we are -- it should drive us to learn from the mistakes that we made and help us succeed, no matter what we do in our lives. It is from losing that we can be a winner, and if we can be a winner in our own minds, it really doesn't matter what the rest of the world thinks of us.
Have you ever noticed how we, as a society, make so much out of the winners in life, while at the same time trip over ourselves to avoid the losers?
Everybody loves a winner, the old saying goes. If you are a winner at whatever you do, people love you. They want to be like you. They want to know what it takes for you to be the winner that you are.
But if you're a loser -- you might as well be dead in the eyes of some. Nobody wants to know what you're doing right, because they just assume everything you do is wrong. You can't get a phone call returned if you're a loser -- nobody wants to talk to you, maybe out of fear that your lack of success is somehow going to rub off on them.
The media, especially, loves a winner. How many times, during this past summer's Olympic Games, did we read, hear and watch stories about swimmer Michael Phelps, who set seven world records and won an Olympic-record eight gold medals in the pool? We heard about everything you could possibly want to know about Phelps, from his upbringing (he has attention-deficit disorder and was told by his school counselors that he wouldn't amount to much of anything), his family and even his amazing diet (which consists of so many calories that it would send most of us mere mortals into obesity faster than you can say "hardening of the arteries.").
Then there was the U.S. Olympic basketball team, a team of NBA athletes we already knew quite a lot about (if we actually pay attention to the NBA during the regular season). Players like Kobe Bryant, LeBron James, Dwight Howard and Jason Kidd have had their life stories told over and over again before the Olympics, and we heard even more in the days leading up to their gold-medal win over Spain in the finals.
There were many more stories of winners told throughout the games, but we didn't hear much about those who didn't win the gold, and even less about those who didn't perform well enough to earn even a bronze medal. Is that lazy journalism? Are we exerting so much energy covering the winners that the losers are cast aside and not worthy of our time?
Unfortunately, it comes down to a simple fact of life -- we love to know about the winners, and really aren't all that interested in the losers. But have you ever thought about those people who aren't successful on the world stage -- whether it's the Olympics or some other arena in life -- who are still winners in the game of life?
Many times, it's how an individual responds to defeat that ultimately defines whether or not that person is a winner in the ultimate game -- the game of life. It's how we bounce back from a losing effort that ultimately determines whether or not we are a success -- not in the eyes of the media, but in our own mind.
One Olympic athlete who I am quite sure fits this mold is a young man by the name of Brad Vering. Vering is a wrestler from the small town of Howells, Neb. He was a three-time state champion who went on to become a national champion in college while wrestling at the University of Nebraska in Lincoln and was a two-time member of the U.S. Olympic team in Greco-Roman wrestling.
I've had a number of opportunities over the years to meet and talk with Vering. When I was publishing an online wrestling website, I was able to feature Vering and had the chance to talk with him personally about his successes and failures in the sport.
Vering has worked incredibly hard to earn the chance to compete in two Olympics during his life. He has had a lot of success, but has also failed on numerous occasions. In fact, after his defeat in the 2004 Olympics, Vering struggled to keep his status as one of the best in his weight class. He tasted defeat on numerous occasions and almost didn't get a second chance at competing in the Olympics.
This summer, Vering was winning his first match when he was suddenly turned in the final 10 seconds. The two points he gave up was enough for his opponent to earn the victory and, in essence, kill Vering's hopes of winning a gold medal.
Does this make Vering a loser? Certainly not -- this young man has achieved more success than most of his critics could ever hope to achieve. I haven't had the chance to talk with Vering about his future plans, but I'm going to bet that whatever it is he decides to do with his life beyond wrestling is going to be a huge success. The lessons he has learned in victory -- and, more important, in defeat -- are lessons he will carry into whatever he does with his life from here on out. He may not have been a winner in his sport's ultimate arena -- but he is a winner in the ultimate game and will be throughout his life because of those lessons.
A number of years ago, the shoe company Nike created a commercial centering around basketball legend Michael Jordan. The commercial showed Jordan, in slow motion, getting off a bus and making his way through the bowels of an unknown arena.
As he walked, you could hear his voice talking about all the failures he has had as a basketball player. Many times he was part of a team that went down to defeat. He went many years without winning an NBA title. He was called upon to take the game winning shot and missed several times.
The commercial highlighted all the failures Jordan has experienced in his life as a professional basketball player. This man is arguably the greatest basketball player of all time, won six NBA titles and numerous Most Valuable Player awards, scoring titles and nominations to All-NBA teams, and yet all this commercial focused on was the failures he experienced. But it was how the commercial ended that brought home the importance of experiencing failure -- "I have failed numerous times in my life," Jordan says in the video. "And it is because I have failed, that I succeed."
Nobody likes losing, and nobody goes out and tries to lose in the game of life. And as much as we hope we can be successful in everything we do, failure (or the fear of it) should not define who we are -- it should drive us to learn from the mistakes that we made and help us succeed, no matter what we do in our lives. It is from losing that we can be a winner, and if we can be a winner in our own minds, it really doesn't matter what the rest of the world thinks of us.
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